silver bells...
as much as i wld like ta b cheery. im sianed.all i care bout is appearances n worth. allll from confimations frm others.
yes. kill me pls. im superficial n i know it.
i dun wan to.
but heck i juz feel so.
so juz kill me alrite.
quick swift painless death wld b sweet.
n then i start ta think of so many things i shld b happy bout.
n after dat cums all the qns again on how much im worth ta others.
how much gratitude. praise. recognition. reliance. i need.
yes it i, i, and i
and all my confidence juz goes tumbling down again.
sumtimes its juz tiring. ta think of wad others might think of me.
but i still care.
awfully much.
yes. i know i shld juz quit it n all.
but ya.
easier said den done.
o wells.
and so i start chanting sum encouragment to myself looking like sum total nutcase whilst zoing out into sum world of my own. with cotton candy clouds. lollipop trees n caramel apples.
lovely aint it.
shout yay with me clap ur hands n sing along please.
ahhhh lovely lovely u are doing it so well sweethearts.
there. i gave u praise i gave u encouragement. n i tried to love u.
now its ur freaking turn.
irritating.
at least i tried so hard ta always b there.
okok. as much as i sound like sum nutcase rambling incoherent tots here. i juz like ta say dat all i done for others i meant it. heck i sound like i did everything for show. when sumtimes it takes so much of me. i juz wanna do it. i juz wanna do it rite. even explaining here now that i meant it sounds fake after that delirous post above. whos ta believe. yadayada.
as i said juz kill me please. irritating.
okokokok.
so ya. lifs been good. besides erm times like the above where i hav too much time ta sit n moan n start thinkin stuff like dat up. yes yes its irritating i know.
ok. steamboat was good. specially the prawns. but thats besides the fact that TAN HE YUAN refused ta go n take more prawns for me, thats y i stopped eating. i realised tc ppl get full quite easily. rahness.
o wells. pool was ok. had fun picking whitney houstons un-singable song. and attempting ta belt out high notes. haz.
so......
pics.........
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the aunty who scuttled ard gettin food for us ta cook. and cooked food as well. hahahahhahaha. jostling-auntie that managed ta get us chicken wings n chilli crab! HOHO. im sorry his face is cut off. WHO ASK HIM TA B SO TALL. knock into mrt train door then u know.
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the triplets.
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Rach's son. she supposedly tot him howta do the clap n giv a wide im-so-freakinghappy-even-if-u-kill-me SMILE. eh. my son taller. hahahahahahahahaha. nanny nanny poo poo. i cna imagine gordon's irritated 'wadeva lo' face if he eva sees this.
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wo de er zi. who calls me niang. hahahahahahaha.
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pool.
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gordon's niang. zoey not tay. and beh the prawn shi fu.
yay.
so i guess. life's pretty good. especially with all dat food.
ong weiqi makes me laugh. coz zhuo ren yao shuang kuai yi dian. haz.
